A powerful, mesmerizingly sad book about a pedophile and his victim


My Dark Vanessa by Kate Elizabeth Russell

Book Review:  5 out of 5 star rating

Vanessa Wye is 15 years old in 2000.  She’s insecure and naïve and oh so young.  She’s an easy target for her teacher, Jacob Strane, who is 42 years old and a pedophile.  While Strane carefully grooms Vanessa towards his ultimate goals, Vanessa is convinced that her actions are consensual and that this is what she wants.

Switch to 2017.  The “Me Too” movement is in full swing.  A former student has accused Strane of abuse.  He’s counting on Vanessa to back him up.  Vanessa assures him that she will since she has always believed that she was the instigator of their affair.  As she reaches back into her memory and reads of the new allegations against Strane, her perceptions and beliefs of the past subtly start to shift.

Wow, just wow.  What a powerful, mesmerizingly sad book this is.  My heart bled for Vanessa as I watched her heart and soul open itself to this abusive man.  She just wanted to feel special, to feel beautiful, to feel loved.  Strane took advantage of that desire and brought such devastation and confusion into Vanessa’s life.  I’ve read reviews saying that this book looks at whether this situation should be considered abuse if it’s consensual, but I truly don’t see how anyone could believe that this was consensual on Vanessa’s part.  Strane wouldn’t stop even as she lay there crying.  She was manipulated into believing this was what she wanted.  Every word that Strane said to her, every look he gave her, every caress he risked was to bring this young girl around to his thinking.  He even used the books he was teaching to convince her of how “special” she was.

Most highly recommended.

This book was given to me by the publisher in return for an honest review.